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Confessions of a Droid virgin

I’ll readily admit I don’t always like change, especially as the years have snuck up on me. It wasn’t long ago I decided it was time to get rid of my old but true friend, my flip-top cell phone. It really didn’t bother me I had trouble remembering my phone number and had resorted to taping my cell number of the phone. I must admit some people looked at me rather strangely. After all, how many times do we call ourselves? Truth be known, the phone was pretty sorry looking.
It all began when I discovered a ring tone I just had to have. After much research, I finally accepted there was no way I could download the theme song to the David Feherty show that comes on the Golf Channel to my antiquated phone. Each time the song begins and Feherty starts to dance a jig, I dance along with him, much to the amusement of my husband. I simply had to have this ring tone. Each time I hear it, it makes me smile, regardless of how my day has been.
After some joshing by some younger friends on the state of my unsophisticated and non-Internet capable phone, I decided it was time to bite the bullet. It took me hours to find the phone that would not only support the ring tone, but looked like something I could maneuver through. I decided on a Droid.
Three days later, the FedEx deliveryman made it up my horrendous driveway in the driving rain, commenting on how it was about washed out. I truly didn’t care. Inside that little brown box was the key to my happiness. Practically running into the house, I ripped the box open and pulled out all the various pieces that I needed to put together. I still haven’t figured out why the phone wasn’t all together and ready for me to start using. And what are all these pieces with prongs? However, it wasn’t long, well, maybe about an hour later, and the phone was charging.
I hurried out onto the front porch to activate the phone. We don’t always have the best reception, and often we have to stand outside to talk on our cell phones. Our Internet service is a bit spotty at times, depending on the weather. But I was not to be deterred. But first, I had to figure out how to turn the phone on.
I found a little button that said, “activate.” So I pushed it, even though the phone hadn’t finished completely charging. Okay, so it was not even at 50 percent, but I really wanted this ring tone. I’m watching the screen and finally I hear “Droid” in this scary computerized voice, sort of like the voice changer toy my children had years ago. The voice on the other end of the phone kept asking me for my Verizon password, and, of course, I couldn’t remember it. I ended up talking to this kind soul in Indiana who attempted to guide me through the process.
The first question she asks me is if I’ve turned off my old phone. Sure, sure, I responded, all the while wondering, did I really turn it off? I couldn’t remember. After a few minutes she assured me the phone is now activated, even though she called me and I couldn’t hear the phone ringing. It didn’t take me long to figure out the phone wasn’t working because old faithful on the desk upstairs was still on. We have a gate at the bottom of our stairs to keep our blind, diabetic dog from wandering upstairs and getting hurt. So I climbed over the gate, up the stairs and turned off the old phone, and repeated the same procedure to get back downstairs. This time, I knew I could activate the phone.
I’m sure you have guessed by now, I needed more help. So I call again and another kind person tells me to type pound and then some numbers. So I do. Nothing happens. Finally she asks if I’m typing on the keyboard on the phone or the dialer. Dialer, what’s that? It turns out you have to click the little green icon with a phone first and then hit the buttons, just like on a real phone. I guess the Droid must be a real phone.
Sitting down with my new toy, I proceed to push a lot of buttons trying to figure out what each one did. Apparently with a flick of a finger, a drag or a push, a whole Internet world can be yours. Who cares? All I wanted was that ring tone. Who cared about my contact list that I couldn’t figure out how to transfer with the backup assistant? That would come later and first things were first.
If you haven’t used the phone for a minute or so, the screen locks up and you have to run your finger from one side to the other to unlock it. I finally found the Internet and, voila, there was my ringbone. However, you had to download it. I couldn’t figure out how to do it, so I simply bookmarked it, thinking all the while that would work. It didn’t. I turned the phone to look at the screen from a better angle, but much to my surprise, the screen turned as I rotated my hand.

Sadly, I had to accept I needed expert help once again. This time, I knew my Droid savvy friends would help me out, although I had to wait two whole days. Once they got their capable hands on my new phone, in just 10 mere minutes, my phone was ringing and, you guessed it, there was the familiar “Yoo-Hoo! Yat-Da Da-Ditty Da.” Sheer happiness, although my coworkers probably thought I was a just a little bit nuts as I practically jumped up and down with glee.
It’s been a week, and I have figured out how to add a few contacts. The alarm clock is set for each morning at 6:00 am, although I don’t know how to turn it off, so I simply shut the phone down for a few minutes. I added our oldest son to my emergency phone numbers, and ended up calling him at 4:00 Pacific Time and panicked as I realized I was surely going to wake him up. I tend to keep hitting the buttons like I’m trying to dial a phone, instead of just a tap of my finger. When in doubt, I just shut the whole thing down.
I’ll get it, eventually. Our brains just process a little bit slower, but that’s okay. At least it still works, at least most of the time.