By Tracy Becker
Licensed Counselor Tracy Becker answers your questions.
Sarah asks: Sometimes I feel joy, but I allow others who are grumpy steal it from me, what can I do?
Thank you for this question, Sarah. This happens to us all more often than we think, but I’m grateful that you are noticing it and wanting to make some positive changes.
The first thing you must do is to strengthen the feelings of joy for yourself. When you can stand strong in this, no one will be able to steal it from you unless you allow them.
I would suggest that you think about the times you experience joy. What, in your opinion, is the cause of the joy? If you can sincerely associate the cause of joy as coming from within you, then you will never have this problem again.
However, if you believe that the beautiful weather; the fact that you are going on vacation soon; that you got a raise; that you fell in love; that you are doing something you love and so forth is the cause of your joy, you can easily see how it would be fleeting.
For most of us, this is the type of joy we experience, the fleeting type that is associated with external happenings and circumstances. Yet, the truth about joy, love, compassion, and bliss is that it can only be attained and sustained through spending time going within and generating it for yourself.
It is very similar to developing a muscle in your physical body so that you can accomplish a certain task.
Focus on exercises that you can do with your mind that will develop a pathway for you to generate joy, love, compassion, and bliss, and you will find that little by little you get better and better at now, allowing other to steal your joy.
You’ve got this!
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